Many people don’t understand that abuse goes further than physical. Neglect is also a form of abuse and can encompass a lack of supervision and a lack of emotional support for children. Even when a parent goes to work every day, it doesn’t mean they’ve fulfilled all of their duties as a parent. Parenting is so much more than that. A mom in California is showing why she left a co-parenting situation with somebody who didn’t want to spend any time with her or their child, and how it was the best decision for them.
Jade (@jade.taylorrrr) shared a very personal video on TikTok of her toddler standing next to his dad’s desk, seemingly trying to get his attention. In the disheartening video, he doesn’t even take his eyes off the computer screen while he plays a video game. Jade captioned the video, “What most of our nights looked like. We would wait for him to come home after missing him all day long, just for him to get on his game. For him to tell us it’s ‘his time’ and he just wants to ‘relax’. All we wanted was for you to love us like we loved you.”
Jade went on to say she posted the video because “what is he gunna do? Finally be a good dad and own up to his emotionally and verbally abusing his family for the last 2.5 years?” Since the video was filmed, Jade is no longer with her ex-boyfriend, stating that she “tried my hardest to make everyone believe he was a great boyfriend and dad.”
Unfortunately, you can’t change someone’s behavior who doesn’t want to change. And an even sadder truth: some people aren’t parent material. There’s nothing wrong with that, just like I’m not a doctor. If you can’t balance work life with family and still have time to enjoy your hobbies, then that’s something you personally have to work on for your own growth.
Commenters replied to the video with their own experiences balancing free time and families. One commenter said, “Nah, I work my 12 hours, come home, play with my child, bathe my child, rock him to sleep and give my SAHM wife the attention she craves during the day and it isn’t until she is asleep will I go play my video games. This isn’t hard. This isn’t rocket science. Pay attention to your families.” Another pointed out, “And when does he make sure you get your ‘relax’ or ‘me’ time?”
Even as a parent, you should get time to relax and decompress. However, the key is balance and respect for your loved ones. They deserve time with both parents, a little bit each day, and nothing should ever step in the way of that, no matter how much you enjoy your hobbies and time alone.