Think back to your childhood. When did you first play the original Donkey Kong arcade game? Was it in an actual arcade on a real arcade machine? Or was it in Donkey Kong 64, trying to beat the arcade machine for the golden banana? Have you played it at all? Well, what if I told you it could be conquered in about one minute? Impossible, you say! Well you’re wrong, and here’s the proof.
So, here we have Jumpman about to climb up the first la–what the heck?! He just climb-looped to the top of the screen! Witchcraft! Level two is pretty simple if you remember the hitboxes for the springs (50m was removed from the NES, Wii virtual console and NES Classic ports of Donkey Kong for some reason). And did anyone else always jump over the rivets in the last level like I did? However you did it, you definitely weren’t as fast as Graystripe. Oh, and on that missing 50m stage, those are actually sand piles, not pies.
There is an Atari 2600 version of Donkey Kong Jr., but good grief is it ever grating on the ears. Not to mention it looks terrible compared to the NES version. However, it is half a minute quicker because there’s so much less to it. As far as gameplay goes, no obvious glitches this time, just a simple matter of timing and dodging obstacles. Kinda funny how older games tended to seem harder than what we have today, yet all it took to beat them was pattern recognition and some memorization.
And that’s our blast from the past for Speedrun Fast. Hope you derived some satisfaction from seeing the speedrunners make monkeys out of these games. If you still haven’t gotten your retro fix, try chilling out to this mellow-music Lemmings run. Yes, someone actually beat Lemmings. Crazy, huh?
Matt Eschbach is a PC, Mac and Android indie game developer and fiction writer. His works have won multiple monetary awards from various contests. Graduating college in 2012 with a major in Game Design, Matt spends his time making stuff up and then building it. His favorite hobby… is sleeping.