It can be eye-opening and even fun to grow up with siblings who you can enjoy experiences with. So many of us have siblings who are slightly older, younger, or even right around our age. One Washington man turned to Reddit after he found out he’s about to be a new big brother. However, this one comes with a twist: He will be a total of 26 years older than his new sibling.
OP posted on r/AmIOverreacting to ask redditors, “AIO: Father that is 55 years old is having a child.” He shared a text stream between he and his father, “I am 26 years older than him. Crazy man.” His father responds to this by saying, “You don’t get the science. This is your family. You are to help raise your family. We are one.” New baby sibling aside, why does his father sound like a new-age guru?
OP goes on to explain his 55-year-old father is having another child after already having children with five different women. He claims his father wasn’t always the best parent because of his drinking problem and lack of stable income. The new baby’s mother isn’t very stable either. Because of that, OP fears he and his older siblings will be stuck raising this child. He also mentions, “I also don’t trust her side of the family to do an adequate job raising a black child due to stuff they have said and their history.”
OP also points out he thinks his father is acting a bit delusional about the whole thing. He mentions, “He says this weird as prophetic BS acting like it’s a man’s job to proliferate as much as he can to uphold the bloodline… no bro you have hella kids and can’t care for them.” He believes instead of having more children, his father should have been focusing on the children he already has. Fair point!
Redditors agree with OP that his father is clearly only thinking of himself. One redditor explained if they were in OP’s shoes, they would consider doing the right thing. “It’s his job as the parent to raise the child not yours, however that said if your father does pass away should you help take care of your sibling? In my opinion yes. Don’t tell your father that.”
OP responds to this by saying he’s in medical school and working towards becoming a physician. He also says he’s has been told by others he shouldn’t consider supporting his sibling if his father doesn’t step up or passes away but he doesn’t feel like that’s the right decision since it isn’t the child’s fault any of this is happening.
Because OP has a right to their peace, others have chimed in telling him he needs to remember to focus on himself since he didn’t put himself in this mess. One commenter replied, “As someone who has direct and recent experience with this, don’t cut them off, but always prioritize yourself.” When somebody who is supposed to care about you puts you in endless difficult situations, sometimes it’s time to put yourself first.